He's got my vote.

I know this may be old news, but this is some gal-darn new age campaigning right here. In case you don't like to read more than a few sentences at a time, I'll summarize:

A reporter in Georgia was macking on a news intern at a Barack Obama press conference, when he stood up to ask a question and was mistaken for a college journalism student by the presidential hopeful, and told he had a "babyface," causing uproarious laughter throughout the room. Naturally, the reporter was not too happy about having his flavor wasted in front of such a large audience, and publicly voiced his spite for Obama.

So what does Obama do when he hears about this? He calls the journalist personally to apologize for "messing up his game." That's a direct quote. If you'd like to hear it for yourself, download the 11/19/2006 podcast of Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me (a very funny news quiz show from NPR) and fast forward to about 10 minutes in.

Awesome.

This is why I shop at Sam's Club.

While dashing to the very back of the store to grab my obscene amounts of bottled liquid, I came upon (what I can only assume) was a single mother and her two children, in the middle of a scolding session. And this is what I hear:

"How did you get syrup on the back of your head?"

I wish I was good at basketball!

"Iverson has been in exile for the past 11 days, languishing on the Sixers' inactive list while still accruing his per-game earnings of $156,218."

Your eyes might have immediately focused on the large dollar amount at the end of the above sentence. $156,218 would be a very comfortable salary, you might be thinking. But read the sentence again. Mr. "We're talking about practice" is making ONE HUNDRED FIFTY SIX THOUSAND TWO HUNDRED AND EIGHTEEN dollars per 48 minutes of basketball he plays, and he plays that 82 times a year...

Completely ridiculous. What's even more ridiculous is that he's not even the highest paid player, currently or in the history of the NBA. No, my friends, that honor belonged to our own Michael Jordan. Who, at his peak made $10,000 per minute of court time (according to that website from the DARPANET days).

Wow.

Just, wow.

Wow because the GDP of this virtual world is $64 million, which ranks it second to last in the world. A place that doesn't even exist is ranked above a real country. I figured it was merely the volume of people spending $2 here, $5 there, but boy was I wrong...

It seems there are quite a few users in the game who have put in nearly HALF A MILLION DOLLARS. I'm probably about 45% nerd, 45% hunk and 10% beard, but that nerd part in me can't sympathize with the people operating that way in this game. Granted, there is an opportunity to make a significant amount of money as well, but who has $500,000 to invest in a startup company in a non-existent world? Not me.

Hmmm...

So while I was soaping my well-defined pectorals in the shower this morning, a commonly used exclamation from SportsCenter popped into my head.

"He's country strong."

Now, in and of itself, that doesn't tell us very much, other than that said player is probably capable of lifting large amounts of weight. But let's delve deeper.

Are Stuart Scott, Neil Everett, Dan Patrick, etc... saying he's strong because he worked on a farm and ate corn while growing up? Or are they saying (I think this is probably it), that said player is as strong as entire nation? That's one hell of an exclamation.

Are they going to start identifying which country? And if a player is bad, are they going to shout, "He is weak like Ukraine!" ??? I sure hope so.

And maybe, just maybe, they will reference a newly formed country in such an exclamation and say, "Adam Dunn, like the newly formed nation of [insert Eastern European country here], shows the World what sovereignty means as he crushes a curveball into the seats in left field."

Wow, this was much funnier in my head...

I just got all warm and fuzzy inside.

The reason.

Nope, it's not the theater.

Ok, I saw Stranger Than Fiction last night, in the theater I lovingly refer to as the "pee theater," and loved it. So, it can be concluded that I don't hate the theater, and that the Prestige and Flags of our Fathers must have actually sucked balls.

Also...

“A couple of ex-students hopped over the school fence on a weekend and went unnoticed by guards.

They managed to get on the roof of the Friary building and somehow mark on the willy. They also burnt a manhood into the grass.”

This is unnerving

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16110298/

Maybe I'll use the rest of my sick days...

It's official

Denzel Washington + Tony Scott = The Balls.